Dating Tips For Men: Why You Can’t Date Without Sex

As you probably know by now, I used to have a lot of trouble meeting women.  And when I was fortunate enough to get a first date, I rarely got a second.

It felt awful, and wasted a lot of time wondering what was wrong with me.  Was it my acne?  Was I being too nice?  Or was I not being nice enough?  I’m not your typical football playing jock, and part of me even wondered if they thought I was too effeminate.  I scoured the internet looking for dating tips for men.

Being so hard on myself was extremely unproductive, when I realized that the reason why these women were rejected me had nothing to do with me.  (Here’s why they did.)

One day I decided to adopt a new mindset– a mindset that a lot of dating tips for men don’t discuss.

I got over my guilt and shame when it came to sex.

I decided I would try to have sex with every woman I went out with on the first dateNo more waiting around until the third date like those other guys who give dating tips for men say to do.  It was beautiful, elegant, and amazingly effective.

I know this may come a shock to some readers.  But here was my rationale:

  1. Most guys want sex, myself included.
  2. Most of the women I saw had fun on the first date, but didn’t want to see me a second time.  Assuming I wasn’t going to get a second chance, I might as well try on the first date, right?

DATING TIP FOR MEN:  Treat every date like it’s your last.

By this dating tip for men, I don’t mean act defeatist.  I mean savor the moment, enjoy your time with her, and go for what you want.  Get over your guilt and shame, and realize it’s okay to have sex.

Surprisingly, a number of women actually DID have sex with me on the first date.

Most women (and men) don’t go on dates to meet the “one.”  They may say that they date because they want a relationship, but the main reason they do it is for the adrenaline rush.

Think about how exciting it is for you to meet someone new– you may be nervous, but you also have this anticipation that the date may turn into something magical.

Because first dates were spontaneous by nature, it wasn’t a huge leap to continue the spontaneity to the bedroom.  For same reason that in the past women didn’t reject me for my supposed less redeeming qualities, they didn’t have sex with me for my attractive qualities, either.  They did it because going out on the date put them in a spontaneous, thrill seeking mood.

What fascinated me the most was that not only did a ton of women have sex with me, but many of them wanted a second date after that.

  • When I had sex with them, I created an emotion inside of them that no first date coffee talk could.
  • After doing it for a while, I got pretty good at having sex.  It was another good thing women could look forward to when seeing me.
  • She also became more invested in me when she had sex.  Who do you think she’s going to want to see again– the nice guy that only did coffee with her, or the guy she had sex with?

DATING TIP FOR MEN:  If she has sex with you, she’ll often backwards rationalize in her mind why she did it– by looking for reasons why you are such a great a guy.  (Other women just want a thrill.)

To justify her actions, she’ll want to see you again.  Is this manipulation?  It could come off that way.  But I made it a point to always be honest about my intentions.  Surprisingly, for most women my honesty wasn’t a deal breaker.  Take this dating tip from me– women love for sex to happen just as much as men do.

Furthermore, almost all of my relationships began with sex on the first date.  And I’ve had some pretty rewarding relationships.

DATING TIP FOR MEN:  Sex is key component for starting a relationship.

I also took a different attitude towards dates that didn’t go well.  I assumed a frame that not getting a second date was almost inevitable, and asked for what I wanted on the first date.  I wasn’t so hard on myself when it didn’t happen.  If anything, when women were rude to me, I had fun with it.

The thing is, that when I talk to most guys, they don’t have the balls to have sex with her on the first date.  But having sex early on is the single MOST EFFECTIVE way of getting anything you want from a women, whether you want a relationship, one night stand, friends with benefits, or something else.

What if I don’t know how to do this?

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  • One Response to “Dating Tips For Men: Why You Can’t Date Without Sex”

    1. Veron March 12, 2012 at 11:55 am #

      I agreed to you in some point. but I prefer no sex during first dates.

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